Be the Holiday MVP
A simple way to make someone’s holiday brighter
I’ll keep this short because you probably have last-minute things to get done or places to go.
Since it’s Christmas Eve tonight and Hanukkah begins tomorrow, chances are you will likely find yourself somewhere enjoying a home-cooked holiday meal sometime during the next week.
If you are in charge of hosting holiday festivities, mazel tov! You might not get all the credit you deserve for everything you’ll do to land that holiday meal on the table, but I see you. And I hope you sleep peacefully afterward, knowing you helped make the Christmas or Hanukkah magic happen this year. Thanks to your hospitality, people will have warm holiday memories to carry forward with them into the new year.
If you will be a guest at someone else’s holiday gathering, first recognize that you’re fortunate. I saw a stat that said 81% of Americans expect to enjoy a home-cooked holiday meal this year, which means that one in five people doesn’t get a chance to celebrate the holidays in such splendid fashion. So be thankful when you are welcomed to someone’s table to celebrate.
If you’ve never hosted a holiday meal, you likely don’t fully appreciate everything that goes into providing that hospitality. Sure you’ve probably seen your mom or your grandmom or your aunt buzzing around the kitchen like a short-order cook on the big day (I know it could be your dad/granddad/uncle, but I’m playing the odds that women are more likely to take the lead with these things). You likely have some sense that being in charge of a holiday meal with guests is more complex than serving up dinner for a few on an ordinary Wednesday night.
But have you ever thought about all that being the holiday head chef entails? In addition to coordinating multiple dishes with varying cooking times and requirements so that they land on the table at the same time, the host has various other duties, such as:
Planning the menu for a multicourse spread that likely includes appetizers and dessert
Going to the grocery store (and possibly the butcher and/or liquor store too)
Inviting guests and coordinating what they might be bringing
Cleaning the house and making sure it’s generally presentable
Ironing a tablecloth
Polishing silver, marshaling serving dishes, and setting the table
If you’ve ever wondered why your mom is a bit cranky or stressed on what’s supposed to be a jolly holiday, all the pressures associated with hosting may explain it. It’s a lot of work on top of everything she usually does.
So here’s a tip that might make the holiday a little brighter: When you are a guest at someone’s holiday meal, help do the dishes. Don’t offer to help; just pitch in and start helping.
As the meal draws to a close, start clearing the table of dirty dishes and food and taking things into the kitchen. Then you can help to put the leftovers away. You can help load the dishwasher. If the host is washing things that can’t go into the dishwasher, offer to dry them.
I promise you if you do this, you will be the holiday MVP. Just when the host’s energy level is flagging, you will be the wind beneath her wings.
If you are dining with your parents, they will experience a warm feeling in their hearts because they will see evidence that they raised you right. If you are dining with your significant other’s family for the first time, you will make an excellent first impression. If your significant other’s family already knows you, this will remind them why they always liked you.
It won’t cost you a thing, and I promise you will have instantly made someone else’s holiday better. Try it and see. I’ll bet you go away with a warm feeling in your heart too.
Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah to all who celebrate!
In the olden days, moms used to clip articles from newspapers for their kids if they thought it was something they needed to know. I’m keeping an eye out for things that you might have missed that may be helpful to you.
This week’s clips:
Behavior scientist and relationship coach Logan Ury says that dream relationships don’t just fall into your lap–you must get clear on what you want and go after it. If you feel like dating is broken, Logan shared science-backed insights about finding success in dating on Mel Robbins’ podcast. Listen or watch.
What do you do when you’ve lost something and even St. Anthony can’t seem to help you find it? A Life Kit reporter asked researchers, a detective and a metal detectorist about their most effective techniques to find missing items. Read on or listen for 6 expert strategies to find lost items that really work.
No matter how you’re feeling about the change of administrations coming in January, organizational psychologist Adam Grant warns: If you’re sure how the next four years will play out, I promise: You’re wrong.